Over the past couple of months, I've had a couple of friends come to me for advice and support as they sort out or go through some relationship (or "just friends") turmoil. I'm happy to try and help and be supportive, but I can't help thinking, "am I really the best qualified person for this?"

History would indicate that I'm not.

In fact, up until about six months ago or so, I was pretty hostile to even the concept of romance. At least twice in my adult life, I've been the co-dependent, emotionally needy shlub with unrequited crushes that end up leading me to pretty drastic life-changing experiences. And this is not some far-distant trend; it just happened again about two and a half months ago. I think this time I finally learned from my mistakes, but still. That those experiences have all seemed to have miraculously worked out for the best is still unrelated to the fact that I'm a terrible relationship role model.

On the other hand, maybe this is how I repair my romantic karma. Maybe by supporting those friends who are now being victimized by some of the same emotional blackmail and overwrought nonsense to which I subjected the objects of my unreciprocated affections, I can wash my love-slate clean.

This might also help make up for that one guy I broke up with via e-mail during my senior year in college.

I told you I'm bad at this!

So I'm happy to lend an ear or a shoulder and to offer advice when asked, but please take it with a huge heaping tablespoon of salt!

I mean, honestly, what the hell do I know?

Labels: friendship, letting go, personal, relationships, strength